I DON’T WANT TO END UP AT THE SHITTY NURSING HOME I’M WORKING AT! AND I JUST DON’T WANNA BE OLD TO START WITH, BECAUSE… OF HERE BELOW….

1) THE NURSING HOME FOOD SUCKS ASS! I’D RATHER BE EATING A VARIETY OF MILITARY M.R.E.’S THE REST OF MY LAST LIVING DAYS! AND BELIEVE ME, THEY ARE GOOD! I ATE THEM ALL THE TIME IN BOOT CAMP!

2) THERE IS NOTHING LIKE SOMEONE TAKING A SHITLOAD OF YOUR MONEY ON LIVING EXPENSES! I’D RATHER LAY IN MY HOME AND DIE THERE! ATLEAST IT WAS ALREADY PAID FOR AND THE FOOD IS ALREADY SUPPLIED! AND, I’D RATHER HAVE SOMEONE (FAMILY OR SOMETHING) LIVING IN WITH ME, TAKING CARE OF ME ON MY LAST FEW DAYS OF LIFE!

3) I WOULDN’T WANT SOMEONE ELSE WASHING MY ASS CRACK AND COCK N BALLS, BUT.. ME OR SOMEONE CLOSE TO ME!

4) IF I NEEDED CERTAIN MEDICATIONS, I WOULDN’T WANT SOME DUMBASS (LIKE PRES. BUSH DUMB) ACCIDENTLY FORGETTING MY DAILY DOSES!

5) I WOULDN’T WANNA HAVE A DUMBASS ROOMATE FLIPPING THE TV STATIONS ALL THE TIME AND WATCHING RETARDED SHOWS! AND THEN NOT GIVE ME THE REMOTE TIME TO TIME!

6) I WOULDN’T WANNA EAT HOT STEAMING FOOD ON A NICE HOT 90 DEGREE DAY ALL THE DAMN TIME!

7) I WOULDN’T WANT FAMILY ARGUING OVER WHO GETS WHAT (OF MINE) WHILE I’M ON MY DEATH BED! THAT ALONE WOULD WANT ME TO PULL MY OWN PLUG ON THE LIFE SUPPORT MACHINE!

8) I DON’T WANT TO BE OLD AND WRINKLY LIKE A FUCKING PRUNE!

9) I DON’T WANNA BE STUPID AND TAKE CHANCES OF DRIVING AND CAUSING ACCIDENTS!

10)  AND THE MAIN REASON IS: I DON’T WANNA DIE A REBORN VIRGIN! USUALLY AT THE AGE OF 50 & UP YOUR SEX LIFE DIES JUST AS MUCH AS YOUR BODY DOES! BEFORE I DIE, I WOULDN’T MIND HOLDING A BEER IN ONE HAND, A CIGARETTE IN THE OTHER AND A GIRL ON TOP! THAT WOULD BE MY ULTIMATE WISH BEFORE I WOULD DIE!

Thank god I’m still young and looking pretty good for my age to! Wheew! Anyways…I’m dreading the day I hit 50! I wish there was such a thing as a Fountain of Youth lol! Anyways…ta ta…later

Twisted