myself

Mr. Sarcastic Charismatic Asshole-astic Wonderfully Fantastic…

General It Is Said

Yeah, that’s me. I guess you could also say I’m immature and so forth as well. But, oh well, fuck it to hell! Why? Because, it’s just ME! And I’m wonderfully awesome no matter what anyone else thinks…because yeah, that’s just how it is…

For example; when I used to be a shitty custodian at the local YMCA, I cleaned it so spotless and wonderful that they needed to wear sunglasses about a 1 mile radius from it… No matter the shittiest job on this planet of shit, I could make things so wonderfully awesome and spotless… Even if I was shoveling Miss. Jackie’s cow shit…

The farmers would look in amazement… “Wow, I need that guy to be MY farm-hand!” Anyway, I don’t know what the point of this post WAS, really. I guess just to brag a little bit, but I guess since I did all that, I should head to bed.

That’s if I could even sleep, because I shine so bright from my glow of awesomeness. Damn, where’s the night shades at… I’d hate to keep myself awake because of myself. Anyway, I’m off to bed… \m/ rock on!!

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Conversations with myself, because the wall is on vacation…

Feelings It Is Said

Yeah, usually I have nice conversations with the wall here in my room, but the fucking bastard decided it was vacation time and just up and left me here…

Ah well, I have awesome conversations with myself anyway!! It also minimizes the chance for a nasty argument too. Anyway, here is one of the latest conversations with myself…

Me: Self, what’s the fucking point of talking to people anyway? I mean, what the hell… it’s not like they’re going to care what you say, they aren’t going to talk to you anyway when they tell you to call or hit them up on messengers… They never answering nor returning calls and messages anyway…

Self: I know what you’re saying, I know how you feel too. My suggestion is, fuck em all!! FUCK EM ALL TO HELL!!!!!!! FUCK EM TO THE CURBS AND FUCK THEIR ROTTING DECAYING BODIES…

Me: Woah there killer! For one thing, I’m NOT into fucking rotting decaying bodies. But, if I WAS, it wouldn’t be with anyone but myself!

Yeah, you heard right… I’d fuck myself right in my decaying tight asshole. Why not right? I mean fuck, I’m always being bent over and getting railed in the ass anyway… fuck it!!

Fuck people, fuck phones, fuck messengers, fuck life, fuck feelings, fuck respect, fuck jobs, fuck the Law, fuck probation, fuck fines, fuck myself, fuck everything else… and last but not least; fuck you too! FUUUUUUUUUUCK!! I WISH I COULD GET DRUUUUUNK!!! FUCKING SUCKS MONKEY BALLS AND LICKS HORSE ASS!!!!!!!! FUCKING PROBATION!!!!!!!! FUCKING EVERYTHING!!!! FUCK IT TO HELL!!

Self: I couldn’t have said it better myself!

Me: Wait, you are myself!

Self: Oh that’s right, I keep forgetting.

Me: Yeah dumb-fuck, now go fuck yourself too…

Self: Okay!

Jesus!, I love the conversations I have with myself…Now kindly go fuck yourselves…

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